5 Regular Questions Men Ask on a Date That Experts go Against...
Here are reasons why you shouldn’t ask a woman these questions on your next date
By Mauris Othuke
First dates can be pretty hectic and intimidating. So as men, we try to say what comes next to our head to fill in the awkward silence and also to make our date feel like we find them interesting.
Silence is king but not on a first date. Meaning it’s inevitable that a man has to talk. But that doesn’t mean he should open his mouth to say things that will make the other party feel unease.
Just like a job interview, if the applicant doesn’t say the right thing, they end up losing the opportunity. That’s also how it is with the first date. If a man does not say the right thing, he ends up being ghosted by the woman at the end of the date.
So how can men avoid being ghosted or irritating the woman they are on a date with? Here are 5 questions experts says you should avoid in order to help reduce your chance of getting on your date’s wrong side;
1. What’s your relationship like with your parents?
Yes, it’s not a wrong thing to desire to know your date more, especially when you’re impressed by what you see. But that shouldn’t make you talk to them like they are your peers.
According to Rori Sassoon, a New York relationship expert, “asking people invasive questions regarding their relationship with family and friends gets too nosy, and it’s not your business”.
The question of “how life has been with their parents, or what it was like growing up or who’s your favorite parent” and all that family questions should be totally avoided, except she doesn’t mind talking about it by raising the topic.
2. How would you do something you don’t like?
The fact that you hate something your date does, doesn’t mean you have the legal right to criticize them for doing it. — one man’s food another man’s position.
Though it might make you feel like you’re not compatible. Criticizing them for what they do will not make them feel comfortable around you. This might also make them feel down on the date.
So “avoid judgmental comments and questions about what someone does or hangs out with, etc.” says Andrea Syrtash a co-author and dating expert.
3. Why did you wear that?
Regardless of what a woman wears or the way she styles it, every man is supposed to recognize the fact that the woman had to put up her best to impress you not to be judged by you.
“Don’t say anything about your date’s appearance unless it’s a direct compliment even if they look different in real life than they do in their photos” says Claudia Duran a Miami matchmaker.
Even if you’re not impressed and have no plans of seeing them again, don’t question what they wear because they will feel mocked.
4. Why did you leave your ex?
“Haha, you’re so funny and charming … but why did your ex leave? BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ. Try as much as possible to cut the “why are you no longer with your ex” out of your vocabulary.
According to Susan Winters, a New-York love coach, “this question is problematic for multiple reasons, however — including the fact your date likely won’t be honest with you”.
A woman is most likely going to tell you why she broke up with an ex with time. Let that time come, don’t force it because you’re looking for red flags.
5. Are you interested in a relationship?
Chances are before you think of popping this question, she has impressed you with her looks, personality, and style. And you might be thinking, “maybe it’s time to secure the bag”.
According to Claudia Duran “even if you’re looking for someone to get serious with, no one likes to be asked on the first because it’s too early to say”.
This question makes your date feel pressured and they are more likely to give you an answer that doesn’t come from the bottom of their heart or say something that won’t make you happy.
Yes, it’s not easy to avoid these questions, but these questions, on the other hand, irritates your date and ruin your chances of seeing them again.
So here are the key takeaways;
- Remove questions about parents from the conversation.
- Even if you’re not comfortable with something she does, don’t criticize her for it.
- She has put in efforts to look her best for you, don’t question her about her appearance.
- Leave talking about eX for mathematics.
- It’s not a wedding, don’t ask her if she wants in a relationship or not.