New Relationships Gets Boring Over Time — Here are 5 Ways to Turn it Up...
Yes! You Can Have A Loving Relationship After Infatuation Is Over
By Mauris Othuke
If there’s a word for how it feels with every new relationship, it’d be joy and paradise. But moments after we move in together or start seeing ourselves more than often, it’ll no longer be a word, it’d be series of introspective questions like “is this how things are going to continue?”
When the relationship was fresh, we usually pray to heaven to give us more time to spend with our partner. But sometime later, when our prayers finally get answered, we begin to “why didn’t this prayer get answered back then when I asked for it?”
Well, just like everything we want, if we don’t put the work in, we won’t experience change or enjoy it the way we want it. So here are a few things we can do to help our relationships grow;
1. Become A CO-mpany…
I’m not saying start a business. I’m saying, if you don’t do things together, it will be really easy to just continue doing things apart — and also do other relationships.
The one thing we all want or can never get enough of is getting in shape or losing weight. This is an easy way to start doing things together. Hitting the gym means you both have a goal that you’re both working on. And as we all know, people working on a goal tend to unite more than those who aren’t.
Other things you can do together include playing your favorite games together. One day, you play theirs and the other day for you. This can also be applied to watching movies and tv series. If they’re not willing to do things that you want, then it’s a sign that they’re not going to be there for you when you need them.
Another thing you can easily do together is going to bed at the same time. It’s usually awkward when one partner loses their sleep because the other is just creeping into bed. Holding yourself to sleep or talking to your s/o before going to bed also eases tension.
2. Act Like A Dog When Your Partner Comes Home
When the relationship began, we don’t let our partner go without saying goodbye. We sometimes call our partner just to tell them that they didn’t say goodbye before hanging up the call. But lately, we kind of don’t do that anymore.
A dog is always happy to see its owner return home every single time of the day.
Little things like welcoming your partner with a hug or giving them a kiss every time they return home can go a long way. I know it will feel like “work”, but do you remember how a welcome kiss or a goodbye made you feel when everything just started?
Other ways to give physical contact are holding hands and smiling at one another. Touch is a powerful thing. If you’re walking by at home, don’t act like they don’t exist, give them a kiss.
3. Speak Each Other’s Love Language
I’m not saying learn how to say “I love you” in Chinese or In German, although that might also be a beautiful thing to do too.
There’s a way your partner loves to be shown love, learn it, or if you’re too lazy, ask them. They will tell you — although sometimes they might ask you to observe. When you use your investigative or listening skills to find them out, (some want quality time together, others love going out together) do whatever they love. This boosts your partner’s happiness and also portrays you as someone who’s really interested in them.
Another off point that can also be tucked in here is, learning to resolve arguments the same day. The bed doesn’t feel the same when there’s an argument. The house temperature always feels different when there’s an argument — I mean there’s no beauty in having an argument with your partner.
4. Quit The “They Know I’m Grateful”
When the relationship began, we say thank you for things that don’t make sense. Don’t let familiarity make you lose your courtesy or social etiquette.
Everybody loves to be appreciated for every single effort they put into doing something for someone. Don’t you think your partner who goes extra length doing more for you deserves appreciation?.
Despite how many times they say don’t say thanks, I’d encourage you not to give in — to terrorist making demands. *winks
Thank them for everything they do. Tell them how much you enjoy their company, and how grateful you feel for having them in your life.
5. Make Them Feel Like Your Morning Star
I love you sometimes seem to be out of reach when the relationship grows into months. But no partner hates “I love you”. Don’t say it too often, but don’t make it seem like something you have to spend your whole money to get.
Also, buy your partner gifts. It’s an awkward thing to buy your partner a gift and all you get is “thank you” after a quick 2 seconds look at the gift. To avoid this feeling, buy them gifts from what they say they like, or items from their wish list.
I know you’d like them to wear what you love. But, how many times do you feel like wearing what they want over what you really want to wear? There’s no beauty in having your partner tell you “I haven’t found the perfect occasion to wear this” when the piece of clothing you bought for them isn’t a wedding dress or graduation uniform.
So, these are some areas where applying these simple changes, will bring a turn around to your relationship that is beginning to feel like it’s growing cobwebs.